First things firsts. No pun intended. A 1st look is a moment that is reserved during the wedding day where the bride and groom see each other for the 1st time (hence it’s name). It’s usually a private moment. This segmented moment has taken the wedding world by storm prompting the breaking of the age-old tradition of withholding from seeing the future spouse until the ceremony. After scouring platforms, community boards, Instagram feeds and a few articles, I, er, I mean ‘we’ decided to chime in on the topic.

It seems like the debate stems from traditional brides and trailblazer brides who see either side to their benefit. While I understand the fact that not seeing each other builds momentum for the first time when you’re walking down the aisle to your groom, there’s also something to consider when you do see him before. Here’s the breakdown from a former bride-turned wedding photographer:

PROS of having a first look:

– Time saver – You skip the fast-forwarding through all of your important family photos/bridal party photos and couple’s portraits immediately right after your ceremony. Hoping that all of these captures can happen within and hours time. You can enjoy more fun, being together and being more present after the ceremony knowing you photographed the VIP groups of your day.

– More is more – You get more photos then you would sans having this segment of time slated for just the two of you. Usually having a 1st look will allow for more portraits later in the day, depending on you. Picture it, more photos to choose from to remember your day.

– Privacy – It’s quite expected that there’s a whirlwind of butterflies fluttering about on a wedding day. About 100% of brides and grooms have said that right after their 1st look they feel less nervous and feel less tension (tension build up from reciting personal vows, timeline delays and other family things that come with a big event). There’s no big expectation from anybody else other than the two of them.

– There’s still that special moment walking down the aisle – Most brides tend to think that it’s easy to forgo having a 1st look because it will diminish that special moment of walking down the aisle to your future husband. Let me tell you, wholeheartedly, between you and me; it’s not less extraordinary. It’s more special because it enables you to be more present with fewer nerves. We’ve seen grooms tear up even already having seen their brides and stay composed entirely when they haven’t. You might’ve already seen each other but never have you walked down the aisle towards him dressed in your most beautiful gown in front of all the people you hold dear. Every couple is different, and there’s no guessing that unique moment of walking down the aisle into forever will be just like what you saw in the movies.

CONS of having a first look:

– You break with tradition – Do you know where the not seeing the bride before the wedding tradition came from? It came from the age of arranged marriages, where the groom wasn’t aware of who he was marrying. So to prevent him running away, they wouldn’t allow him to see his bride until the ceremony. Talk about tradition? Arranged marriages are not the tradition in our society anymore so why not embrace new ones?

– It might be bad luck – Again bringing back the wedding adage of not seeing each other comes with a little superstition. I’ll be quick to counter that, because the fact that you’re marrying each other, the fact that you found each other in a world of 7 billion inhabitants, the fact that you’re celebrating, means that there’s hope for a better tomorrow. Weddings are these celebrations of life that are one big scoop of good luck and thousands of blessings regardless of how your timeline unfolds.

– Are there truly any cons?

Let’s face it, we’re biased, but can you blame us? We have found that some of our most inspiring wedding galleries come from weddings that have realistic timelines with 1st looks included. Formerly being a traditional bride, I so wish I could go back and at least could’ve held Victor’s hand just to know he was there on our wedding day. He’s my best friend, and I almost texted him a photo of my dress because I wanted to share it with him so bad that it felt weird to keep something from him. He also agrees. There are many unique and creative twists that can also be considered, like a father/daughter first look, the first touch (just being able to hold hands without seeing one another before the day), or even a groom singing a song to his bride while being in separate rooms, the list is endless. The point being, a wedding day is personal so choose to make it personal and unique.

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